I have zero desire to write and my brain hurts from staring and screaming at a computer screen for over five hours but if I don't write something, anything down this day will feel completely wasted so here goes...something:
I'm sitting at my desk trying desperately to update my website and failing at an almost Olympic level. I think it has been five hours and I have nothing to show for except a basic home page and the successful deletion of all the other ones. Yep. Everything..gone. It doesn't matter. It was all old stuff anyway and not old enough to be interesting, at that.
When I first became a "working actor," I was doing pretty well and hired someone who made me a dynamite website. It had all sorts of bells and whistles -- yes, FLASH was all the rage and I had more flash than a museum nightmare (that joke is for my husband and all his peeps over at The Met #noflash)! Alas, the times have changed and although I have been keeping up with social media, etc., I had ignored my website and it was time to update it. For starters, my name changed back in March 2017! Legally and professionally. Formerly known as Veronica Alsina -cursed with a name that was often misspelled, mispronounced, and worse still, forgotten- I took on my husband's last name and was rather thrilled to see "Veronica Delgado" was available in the Screen Actors Guild's list of names (one has to check these things).
And so, since the name had changed, I clearly needed to obtain a new domain and change all sorts of parts of my site. I started with social media (easy) and I thought that was enough. But then I remembered that all the photos and reels are at least 7-8 years old. Everything should be new. But I am nothing if not filled with excuses and self-sabotage...Arghhh.... Honestly I just gave up because I was hoping my web guy would magically return and fix it all for me. #noluck
But I have to do this, I need to do this myself and it has to be done ASAP. My career depends on it. I recently met with a couple of casting directors and they all said the same thing: that having a working, mobile-friendly, simple website is (still) very important in this industry. A simple actor's website should contain a home page, headshot/other photos, resume, reels, contact info, social media links. Sounds easy enough, no? I must keep trying. I must go back and continue. I was blessed with a day off and I should have something to show for it. Something good. Something useful.
So why the struggle? The beginning is always the hardest part. That's why I started writing this with zero thought. I am typing very, very fast in a stream-of-consciousness, unedited way to see if anything inspirational happens. By the way, I'm half-way through Big Magic and I have my fingers metaphorically crossed. I also recently started my first #bulletjournal and this would theoretically fall under the #braindump category and I think it's working. I feel better. A little less cloudy in the brain. Now if only lightning would strike. No, nothing stormy. Clear, sunny days. Clear vision. Well...at least the flash is gone. Hopefully my next post will tell you my website is up and running. Until then, I remain, frazzled, a little crazy and sincerely...
Yours,
Vern
